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| Bridesmaids, Bob and I (wearing imishanana) |
My friend Bob invited me for his cousin’s wedding and I got the opportunity to attend a traditional Rwandan wedding which was very fascinating and different from the Nepali weddings I am familiar to. The first part, or the traditional part of the wedding takes place at the girl’s house and this is where the uncle of the girl decides whether he wants to give his niece to the man that she has chosen. In the traditional Rwandan wedding, parents don’t have significant roles, instead, it is the uncles of the couple that play a major role.
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The banana tree plants outside on both sides of the road signifies that there is an important ceremony taking place –in this case, the wedding. |
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| The guests (groom's side) walking to the bride's house |
I may not have gotten all the details of the wedding because it was in Kinyarwanda but my friend did the best to translate the important parts. It starts of by the groom’s uncle explaining why his nephew would be a perfect husband for the bride. The main goal of this traditional part is for the groom’s uncle to impress the bride’s uncle through gifts, witty words, and the qualifications and traits of his nephew. This ceremony does not guarantee marriage for the couple. The green signal is dependent on the chemistry of the uncles and whether the groom’s uncle impresses the bride’s uncle. Apparently, there have been times when the bride’s uncle has rejected the groom because the chemistry between the uncles was lackluster and the bride’s uncle was not impressed with the words of the groom’s uncle. This part of the traditional ceremony is just conversations between the uncles while the rest of the wedding party sit, listen and laugh. The wedding guests are segregated into two sides: the bride’s side is on one side while the groom’s side is on the opposite side.
Once the bride’s uncle agrees and before the bride comes out, many other women are sent out as a joke and to heighten the anticipation of the wedding guests until the real bride comes out. The groom side gives her dowry which is usually in the value of cows. It’s really interesting to see that weddings are all about satisfying the bride’s side of the family rather than the husband’s side. In Hindu weddings, it is usually the groom’s side you are trying to impress/please with the amount and kind of dowry you can provide. Also, the traditional wedding here involves a lot of speeches and conversation which is very personal and tailored to the bride and groom whereas Hindu weddings involve the same rituals that have carried on for years which is led by the priest.
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| The uncles talking it out and shaking hands :) |
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| The gorgeous bride and the handsome groom |
Once the bride walks out, the couple exchange rings and receive blessing from their parents while the naming of the cows (the ones given for dowry) take place. Finally, everyone heads to church after for the religious marriage ceremony and the reception.
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Joseph (my awesome translator) and I at the wedding
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| The Bride and the groom with the bridesmaids and best men :) |
